The Dan Le Batard Show

Content Warning: This episode will discuss Tyreek Hill and the alleged domestic abuse of his pregnant wife. If you or a loved one has ever been the victim of domestic abuse, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.7233. "I am embarrased." Nick Wright joins the show to discuss his gambling winnings and the success of his Chiefs, and that leads him, Dan, and the rest of the crew to discuss the latest testimony from Tyreek Hill's estranged wife, Lakeeta Vaccaro Hill. Dan and Zaslow discuss their own regrets in the way they discussed Hill while he was down here in Miami and the importance of sharing Lakeeta's experience in her own words. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"You will not wriggle away." Visit catchphrases.thegregcoteshow.com, a very interesting website that many people are talking about. A local sports anchor snuck 16 Greg Cote Catchphrases into a newscast. That's catchphrases.thegregcoteshow.com. Joanthan Bailey recently recorded the sexiest damn audiobook you've ever read with your ears. Again, catchphrases.thegregcoteshow.com. The Tyson chicken man laughs like a serial killer. Click on catchphrases.thegregcoteshow.com. Jeff Hafley used an interesting metaphor to describe his team's future success. One more time: catchphrases.thegregcoteshow.com. Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Greg, Roy, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, and Roy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"What a douchenozzle!" Ball doinks, more points! JuJu has some rule changes, updates on The Polls, Show Awards, and a Joker of the Day. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I can live with the violence." Penalties are an epidemic, Wemby is a galactic fascist, and Chris calls Tony 'plum dumb.' Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I don't trust a decorative ladder." 'Uncle Dick's Rough Riders' owner, Uncle Dick, has a list of Uncle Dick's Dirty Dozen. There will be no further explanation. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"As I won't." Chris is feral with his Top 13 Scorers in Miami Heat History, Dan is excited to celebrate his Rays and their beautiful brand of baseball, and Greg and Zas rip LeBron for refusing to live in Philadelphia while claiming to speak for every fan alive. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"The Jack Strand Show with Jack Strand." Zaslow is struggling due to his stye, Cam Ward dismisses Troy, the Saints no longer have Dan's attention, and Chris predicts a "let down" for the Bengals. Also, is Tyler Herro a Top 15 scorer in Miami Heat history? Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Greg, Roy, Chris, Jeremy, and Tony. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

One month into the NFL season, the league has officially turned into a fever dream. From an instant-classic shootout between Kansas City and Las Vegas to the Dolphins miraculously covering the spread for the first time all year, no leads—or storylines—are safe. We break down whether Dallas is crazy enough to let George Pickens walk while CeeDee Lamb dominates as the clear-cut No. 1, and detail how New England pulled off a staggering comeback to keep the Bills from putting the AFC East on ice in October. Plus, with seat heat rising fast, we ask the million-dollar question: Is Mike McDaniel’s time in LA running out? To wrap it all up, NFL Media’s Lance Zierlein stops by to drop high-stakes knowledge on everything happening with the Houston Texans. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"BOX PLUS MINUS, BOX PLUS MINUS!" The only other guy to do what Jackson Chourio just did was... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I'm a math terrorist with close ties to Algebra, and I have weapons of math instruction." Amin delivers his Weekend Observations and takes a swipe at, YOU GUESSED IT, Lionel Messi before explaining why Erik Spoelstra is so excited to coach Giannis Antetokounmpo. Then, we take a peek at The Something That Smells Bad File before Tony delivers his Top 5. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Risakizumab-rzaa." Chris does everything he can to help Dan understand our Michael Wilbon segment, but Dan, as usual, undermines him. Plus, Josh Allen threw a backward-forward-but-forward-and-also-backward pass, Dan learned about SKYRIZI, and Austin Wells made Tim Kurkjian apoplectic. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"You've been terrible today." Dan admits to having 112 NFL Observations, mostly from the witching hour, but things slowed down when his throat made a really weird noise. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"What's happening at halftime? Are we eating a meatball sub?" Of all the incredible College Football, NFL, and MLB Playoff moments from over the weekend, why did Dan catch Zas and Tony arguing about a field goal from Friday night? Plus, a breakdown of Mike's 'I'm lookin at you' moment from the University of Miami game. Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Roy, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, and Tony. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It is only Week 4 in the National Football League but we already have some season-defining showdowns on tap this weekend. Can the Dallas Cowboys break through against the Houston Texans as the former AFC South favorites try and avoid falling to 0-4? Can either the Los Angeles Chargers or Rams come away with a win this weekend to ignite their seasons? How do the San Francisco 49ers and Denver Broncos match up as possible Super Bowl contenders in their respective leagues? Plus, Trevor Lawrence and Joe Burrow face-off in a rematch of the 2020 National Championship Game to see where they stack up with each other, and where their teams measure up in the AFC race. We've also got our Week 4 selections for Picks Picks Picks, our Stress-Free Sunday picks, and Arif Hasan of Wide Left Football joins us to discuss which teams need a win the most in this pivotal Week 4. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I didn't end my family vacation in North Carolina to lose in the second round!" Matthew Berry joins us for his weekly fantasy advice segment. He tells us why we need to start viewing Brock Purdy as an elite fantasy QB, what to do with Drake Maye, and whether starting two tight ends could be a legitimate fantasy strategy moving forward. Plus, we discuss the Jalen Duren extension and how to handle flying first class with a friend if they do not have a first-class seat. Following this week's news out of Cornell University, Zaslow and Dave discuss the responsibility parents have to talk with their sons about preventing similar incidents. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I wake up with these pipes." The new voice of the Miami Heat, Gale Sayers Nelson, joins us in the studio and gives Zaslow the introduction he deserves. Nelson tells us how he plans to follow in the footsteps of the legendary Michael Biamonte, what traditions are sticking around, and how he plans to differentiate himself from such a giant of the game. Plus, it's time for another edition of Big Game or Not a Big Game, and Dave breaks down his Pittsburgh Steelers' disheartening loss to the Cleveland Browns, who may or may not be a legitimate football team. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"It's not ' The Heat Are On '; that'd be a terrible song." Zaslow fell asleep after a period of the Florida Panthers game last night and woke up to learn that Aleksander Barkov had gone down with an apparent leg injury. The mood is somber as we await news on the Panthers' captain. Is Mike Schur a terrible sports fan because he didn't watch his Boston Red Sox lose to the New York Yankees in the Postseason? Would Dolphins fans rather their team go 0-17 or 6-11? Is the one that sounds right wrong? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Mark Reynolds." New producer Gabe made a fatal mistake, so we have some controversy to settle from last week's trivia, with a chance for Chris to STEAL a win back from Jeremy before we get to THIS week's game on... baseball mistakes. Plus, Adnan is here to start his run of Playoff analysis as we get you set for Game 3 of Braves vs. Phillies and the upcoming NLDS and ALDS series that have already been decided. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"There was some crack showing." Did you know D'Angelo Russell is a Shanghai Shark? Did Amin torpedo the show? Is Tommy Lee Jones always there with the furrowed brow? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"He has kakorrhaphiophobia." Amin is here, and before he gets to his Weekend Observations on a Thursday, he has some thoughts on Kawhi Leonard being unaware of Pablo Torre and the money Jalen Duren has cost himself. Then, his 3-day-late Weekend Observations cause a kerfuffle among him, Dan, and the rest of the crew. Plus, does the reaper have black friends? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"The peeing on somebody was really vivid." Texas is back in the spotlight, and their AD is acting as such. Tony is back from Disney and has a Top 5 from the NFL Weekend, Mike Tomlin has built a magisterial empire, Dan is under fire, and Mike and Zas are fighting over who knows more about College Football. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"David would do well in prison." We kick off the hour with David Samson discussing the latest turn in the Kawhi Leonard saga and Kawhi claiming not to know who Pablo Torre is. David also weighs in on the action in the MLB Wild Card round and whether it could force big changes to the Postseason system in the new CBA. Then, Bruce Willis' co-star in American Siege, legendary sports collector, and owner of the World Jai-Alai League, Rob Gough, joins us in the studio to discuss the changes he is bringing to the sport in Miami and his $12 million sale of a game-worn Michael Jordan jersey. And of course, David can't help but suggest that he needs to fire people. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"They're happier than a dead pig in the sunshine." Tony is furious that we spoke to Larry the Cable Guy without him. Zas knows Miami will crush the Clemson Tigers, but Mike wants to avoid the rat poison. Chris fishes wedgies out of his pickle. Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Roy, Chris, JuJu, Mike, and Tony. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Judd Apatow is behind some of comedy’s greatest movies and shows— making audiences laugh for over three decades. Now, he’s focused on preserving the stories of the legends who made him laugh. Apatow joins an overly-delighted Dan to talk about his new Netflix documentaries on the strange, beloved Norm Macdonald and gloriously weird Maria Bamford. Apatow also reveals the rather chaotic inner workings of his mind (like showing up to a Wes Anderson premiere 1 hour and 40 minutes early), his anxiety, and his psychedelic experiences. Apatow also shares the project he’s worked on that he’s most proud of in his career as well as his recent reflections and insights into Knocked Up, The 40-Year-Old Virgin - including why Steve Carell is a liar about waxing - and trying to explain the gravitational pull of someone like Adam Sandler. “Norm: The Tale of Norm Macdonald” premieres October 16th and stream “Paralyzed by Hope: The Maria Bamford Story” on October 23rd only on Netflix. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit…

"I admire Walt Weiss and his feel for the game." Happy birthday on October 11 to Uncle Dick Cote, Tony Khan, Kevin Clark, Chris Cote's friend Jeff, and Ethan Budowsky's mom. Your birthday is the day after Mike Ryan's, but not Drew Lock's, whose birthday is November 10. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"What a bizarre man." Do you want to welcome the NHL season? Should the referee wish all 32 teams luck before puck drop? Plus, Jess joins us to discuss the weekend that was in college football and the weekend ahead. Should we put the town on alert for the Gators in Missouri this weekend? Should Pitt and Virginia Tech be ranked above the Tigers? She also touches on the latest from the WNBA playoffs. Did the FIBA break do the Minnesota Lynx in as they suffered a sweep at the hands of the New York Liberty? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I'm a man's man. I admit when I say club foot, and it's inaccurate." This week's celebrity prognosticator is Larry the Cable Guy, and don't worry, Dan definitely knew that right off the bat. He tells us why the Cincinnati Bengals are doing what they don't wanna be doing and why the Jacksonville Jaguars will beat them. He also dives right into Greg Cote's wheelhouse and longs for the 1976 Raiders. Plus, John Rocker and Will Clark look different than you could ever imagine, and Dan wasn't moved at all by JJ McCarthy being traded to the New York Giants. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Dan, you need to tell your dad you love him more." Dan dives deeper into why he sacrificed his baseball Hall of Fame vote, and Greg Cote continues explaining how he could have kept it. Did Greg Cote's children truly appreciate his legendary career as a Miami Herald columnist? Plus, the group discusses the Senate's passage of the Protect College Sports Act and who this legislation would actually protect. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Do you know what it was like to have to determine if Rostislav Olesz was the next big thing?" Hey, Carolina Hurricanes. Guess what? Daddy's home. Hey, baseball. Guess what? MLB Hall of Fame voter Greg Cote actually watched one of your games. Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Zaslow, Roy, Chris, JuJu, and Mike. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Troy Glaus!" It's the first edition of our Nothing Personal with David Samson crossover with Jeremy Tache from The Pitch Clock, as they recap the first day of the MLB Postseason with Game 1s across each Wild Card series. It's proverbial Overreaction Monday as we determine if the Padres are a threat, if the White Sox are good, if Austin Riley is an all-time playoff great, and if Ben Rice is... REGGIE JACKSON?! Plus, David and Jeremy determine if anyone can push a series to Game 3 tonight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I do believe you should schedule a meeting." Have you ever seen a manager announce his own firing? You have now! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I'm pretty sure Superman is cool watching TV and eating BonBons." Greg Cote has benched his starting QB, and Jalen Hurts stinks on MNF. Plus, Dan is amazed by a balding NFL player, but not as amazed as Steph Curry is by the lack of expectations for his Warriors. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"And finally..." The long-awaited moment is here: Greg Cote reveals his No. 1 catchphrase. Plus, the crew gets into a sprawling conversation over Jaylen Brown's answer of "next question." Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"If I have chronic to severe plaque psoriasis, I know exactly where to go." Mind your p's and q's, folks. Zaslow wants to celebrate the Top 5 TV and Movie Principals after the passing of Dennis Haskins, the DHS continues to use the likeness of an NFL player against his wishes, and Dan breaks news about a product the NFL is selling. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Shoutout to Isaiah Smalls from the Herald." The small-time Dolphins, the ever-dominant Panthers, Candy Corn Journalism at Heat Media Day, and the legend of "Car 54." Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Roy, Chris, Jeremy, JuJu, and Zaslow. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"He docked his boat in Kendall. It was very authentic." Dan reads the top 20 from the New York Times' list of the best TV shows of the 21st century, and everyone has notes. Did Dexter get jobbed? Why is Planet Earth so low? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Has the 'Peace be with you' become a fist bump over time, Roy?" Dan wraps up his Football Observations, including a 397-pound Steelers tight end whose nickname sounds a lot worse out loud than it does in print. A Clemson punt returner passing on a high five makes the crew wonder: do you high-five strangers at games? What about at church? It's that time of year where we learn who is old by how few artists they know on the VMAs. Plus, Zaslow has thoughts about Madonna, Deion Sanders has new toes, and Dan takes on Craig Carton's criticism of Pablo Torre's report on Life Surge and Tim Tebow. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"But I do think my pain threshold is better than his." Amid a litany of backup quarterbacks being used in Week 3, Mike Ryan wonders if Caleb Williams could handle walking barefoot into a couch. Which tattoo spot hurts the most: the knee, the chest, or the skull? Dan is amazed at Brock Purdy's explains how much of the field a quarterback can't see, and Mike downgrades Steve Sarkisian from "Sark" to "Steve" after a Texas celebration. We've got Giannis Antetokounmpo discovering iguanas, and the crew debates what the hit on Dante Moore says about how much football has changed. Then Dan finally watches what P.J. Fleck did after the win at Washington. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"We're Having Beautiful Weather Today" Has Drake Maye forgotten how to play football? While we're at it, let's watch as Jameis Winston stares off into the middle distance and unspools a tapestry of wisdom. Are Bo Nix and the Broncos are actually good at winning close games. Then Zaslow and Dan continue to clash over field goals in the NFL amid the outcome of Ravens vs. Cowboys Cowboys in Rio. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"If that had ended simply with Scott Hansen falling to his knees and ejaculating...I would not have been surprised." Kevin Harlan seamlessly weaved in a Greg Cote catchphrase on the Chiefs vs. Dolphins broadcast. Was it better than Kyle Brandt's gibberish approach? Dan continues his Football Observations countdown. Is Cam Ward losing his confidence in Tennessee, or is he just surrounded by nothing? Scott Hanson goes wild during RedZone chaos, J.J. Watt learns how hard it is to be a broadcaster, and Malachi Toney got robbed. Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Roy, Chris, Mike. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It’s Episode 85—or as Chad himself would call it, the Ochocinco show. NFL analyst Ross Tucker stops by to explain why Chad Johnson is criminally underappreciated, while also breaking down why Matthew Stafford deserves way more respect. Then, Tony Calatayud explains why Brock Purdy has been an absolute nightmare for opposing defenses since day one. Plus, we break down a high-stakes week for LA: the Chargers desperately need a win, and the Rams need to put an end to a painful era. Finally, we head south to Brazil, where the Ravens and Cowboys better check their footwear before stepping onto the wildly questionable turf at the Maracanã. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I bet Rony Seikaly had a good childhood." Jeremy says it's over for Taylor Swift. Oronde Gadsden. Matthew Berry is here to give out his best fantasy football advice. Oronde Gadsden. It's time to get ready for GTA. Oronde Gadsden. Jason Sudeikis can hoop. Oronde Gadsden. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I don't want him to be the test goat." Can you name a whole bunch of college football teams that wear orange? Can you name this century's NL home run leaders? Do you like plantains? Great! This segment is for you! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"...on behalf of ice cutters, steel workers, and pin setters everywhere." We were having fun until Amin crossed the line. Dave is shaming the Devils, Mike is lamenting the loss of jobs across, and we're talkin' Texas and Tennessee. Plus, for the rest of this season, who would you rather have: The U or the SEC? Today's cast: Amin, Your ol' pal Dave Dameshek, Roy, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, and Tony. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Yes! You heard that right! Dan Le Batard is actually joining the Pitch Clock this week! He FINALLY sits down with Jeremy to discuss his Tampa Bay Rays and what makes the AL East Champions so enthralling to him. Plus, new producer Gabe puts the boys to the test for the first time as Chris and Jeremy try and pair up some pitcher and catcher duos from their heyday of baseball. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"That's not an undercurrent, that's a full current." JuJu joins the show for a record-breaking Thursday Thunder; Tony tells us about the Spanglish FIU football broadcast he is doing with his dad; and Dan goes toe-to-toe with his inner monologue as we try to answer whether Penn State-Wisconsin is a big game. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"I'll pick it when I sweet well please." Jessica joins us to preview the upcoming weekend of college football, including a Factory of Sadness Game between USC and Oregon. We also relive a legendary radio call that reminds Dan of the origins of radio transmission to submarines. Plus, we go to The Bucket, and after a decade of playing, Dan shows us he still somehow doesn't know the rules. He then introduces us to our latest entity, Le Batard+ in a way only he can. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Pelle Larson will get up in your shit." A loaded hour begins with Big Game or Not a Big Game. It ends with Real or Fake Podcast, but in between, the gang discusses the latest question raised about the Miami Heat, which Zaslow has declared the dumbest thing ever said about the organization: who is going to play defense on a team that has Giannis Antetokounmpo, Bam Adebayo, Davion Mitchell, Bobby Portis, Andrew Wiggins, and Erik Spoelstra as its head coach? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Then he got a batting donut and started swinging in the on-deck circle." David Samson joins us to weigh in on Pablo Torre's latest report involving Life Surge and Tim Tebow. He also offers his perspective on Vladimir Guerrero Jr's comments about his contract and makes a bunch of 1970s references along the way. Then, on the eve of the 10th anniversary of José Fernández's tragic passing, David walks us through what that day was like and how the tragedy still sticks with him. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Hey, listen, kid, you've been traded to Boston College." Pablo Torre joins the show to discuss the latest major story being reported on Pablo Torre Finds Out, involving a company called Life Surge, Tim Tebow, and alleged exploitation of people through religion. What is Tebow's responsibility in this situation? Dan explains why a story reported Friday that came out Thursday should be the biggest in sports. Mike wonders whether the Miami Hurricanes should play Mark Fletcher and Malachi Toney against the Central Michigan Chippewas this Saturday; Zaslow doubles down on his college football trades take, and OJ is joining him on Zaslow Show 2.0 today. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices